MY RANT by babsy face*

i would llike to preface my... rant? by saying these are the jumbled thoughts of a semi switchy subbie with waaaaaaaaaaaay too much time on my hands and thoroughly enjoying being back in school *giggles* i over think and constantly contradict myself  adds to my charm... but these thoughts are just that, MY thoughts, not personally related to anything.. just want us A/all to take time and think about things and question, grow and learn, and hopefully these thoughts of mine help provoke discussion

Philosopher erich fromm believed people had two basic orientations, having and being. Havers seek to aquire, things, property and ppl, people who have being orientation focus on the experience, get meaning from sharing with other ppl and experiences. In bdsm we focus so much on the having Eg; owning, being owned. We forget about the being aspect of it all. This is all based on my own inner thoughts, conversations with friends and observing discussions in our slave chat. 

Ive noticed that people in our community go into discussions looking for “right” answers. And we jump into relationships we have reservations about, those of us who take a more…. Active role in rooms and discussions try to impress that our couples need to take time to get to know one another, and I understand that need to be owned, I do, but the experiences you can have playing in rooms, and talking in private to ppl, not just those opposite your role.. they are irreplaceable. 

You discover more about yourself than you would ever expect in just talking to others. People bring out different aspects of you depending on the topic and stimulation it brings, see things in a new perspective and open up to new ideas, And its not just us subbies, Doms as well. Giving into the constant having, the status of how many or even who they own seems so important when it shouldn’t. why not be with someone who challenges you mentally and can submit to you in their being and heart. 

Why not have someone own you for wanting you exactly how you are and wanting to make changes and grow with you, not limit yourself or the standards you hold for yourself. Learn explore, adjust your limits based on what you feel you’ve accomplished as a dynamic.  love who you are and love who your becoming with all the info you do find take the time to find things that relate specifically to you, dont dwell on the past because "the past is just the future with the lights on" building blocks are the foundation of our community, not just for one on one dynamics but the friends we keep as well